Remembrance Walk

Saturday, May 8, 2010

"The Walk of Remembrance" was held at Thanksgiving Point gardens in honor of the little ones who have passed away. We gathered together at 9:15am, as the names of those babies were read out loud, including Ty Edward Kiefer. Inside, there was a slide show of baby pictures playing to gentle music. Ty's photo was the last one in the cycle. I was grateful they were able to add his photo, despite the late submission. From the photos, Ty looked like one of the oldest babies to have died. Many of the babies seemed to have died quickly after birth, due to congenital problems. The question has been asked many times, "What is worse? Knowing you will lose your baby almost right away, or having him for a few months before losing him?" This topic was brought up in our support group, when Dan mentioned how hard it was to know Ty for months, only to lose him. One mother, who's baby died in her arms after 57 minutes, commented, "I'd give anything to have my baby for that long." Just another reminder that life is all about perspective.

The garden is so beautiful and peaceful, as we leisurely walked around. We came to what we called, "The Secret Garden". These cute doors opened up to a smaller, enclosed garden with a fountain. We also had a good laugh. While I was examining one of the doors, Ryan sneaked back to the other side and quickly rapped on it. I don't know why, but it totally scared me! I jumped back and threw my arms around Jamie in fright! Speaking of Jamie, does her pose look familiar?

This is my friend, Jamie M. She first approached me after relief society, 10 days after the funeral. She was emotional as she tried to express the desire and impression she had to "take care of" me. I was touched by her words, but lacked the ability to say anything, so I threw my arms around her and embraced her. We didn't know each other, but we both felt the need to change that. Since then, we walked almost every week for 2-3 hours at a time, talking about everything. Our friendship progressed so quickly. I've never connected with someone outside of my family as fast as I have with Jamie. Ty's death had a profound impact on her in ways that allowed us to lean on one another and grow spiritually. In fact, Jamie was one of a couple friends who constantly sent me uplifting messages through scriptures and quotes, almost on a daily basis, which helped banish the hurtful thoughts. I truly believe she and I were very close friends in the spirit world. I have no doubt we promised to find each other and help one another during these hard times.

 

 

I didn't need to walk to remember Ty. I will never forget how he has changed my life and influenced so many others. But I walked to honor him, reflecting on the cherished memories that I cling to.